It all just feels so weird

   I started my last year as an undergrad about three weeks ago, and it absolutely terrifies me. I never thought that three years ago, I'd be so nervous about graduating. The years we're given as undergraduates are like save havens. Those years are like us buying our own time. Once you're done, it's like you're thrown out into the world. You worked so hard to earn that sheet of paper, and try so hard to find a job that you question if that little piece of thin paper was worth all those thousands of dollars.
  I finally decided that I'm definitely going to take at least a year off before graduate school. I have a professor that recommended I take off for a year for sanity purposes. Because once I begin grad school, it will be become my life. He told me I wouldn't have much time for anything else but my schooling. I sure as hell hope he's kidding. Because I constantly worry about how I'm going to support myself. I'm not taking a year off to live a little or "enjoy being young," as he put it. I'm taking at least one year off because I have to. Because I am dead set on moving to California and going to graduate school for film studies there. If I don't work full time next year, I will have no way of being able to move there and live on my own.
  I thank my lucky stars every day that I found a guy like William. He supports my crazy change in life plans, and is definitely moving there with me. Aside from the obvious reasons, I'm so glad that he's moving with me. He's always wanted to go to film school, and I feel like he'll actually go if we lived there.
  Don't get me wrong, I'm very excited to be graduating and eventually moving to California. It's just so terrifying with today's economy. I just hope everything falls into place soon enough, and that I can finally rest assured.